The professor who organized the gay wedding declined to be named

Joseph Kuilema, a professor of social work at Calvin University, is increasingly an exceptional employee. Both fellow faculty and supervisors note his passionate faith and commitment to students and the mission of the college. But despite his excellent work record, he is likely to be out of work soon.

The reason? Kuilema performed same-sex marriage last year for another evangelical university employee. And this is not his first fight with Calvin over LGBTQ + rights.

Kuilema was denied tenure in 2018 for his advocacy for LGBTQ + rights. Instead, it was a two-year cycle of renewable appointments.

Last autumn, Kuilema performed the wedding of Nicole Sweda, who was a research associate at the Calvin Center for Social Research. Sweden violated Calvin’s policy of preventing same-sex marriages for employees, but instead of replacing them, the university dismissed the research center as an independent entity. Exit Sweden anyway. Now Kuilema may also be out of office: the Calvin Professional Status Committee has recommended that he be reappointed for a third term.

Memoranda detailing the decision to reject Kuilema ‘s reappointment note his commitment to his students, his excellent work record and the support of his peers, but ultimately cite his role as a same – sex marriage official, as a direct violation of university policies established by Christ. Amended. Church, which defines marriage as between a man and a woman.

Although Kuilema intends to appeal, he knows that Calvin’s may limit his days.

“I love teaching in Calvin. I love my colleagues. I love our students. As someone who went to the institution [as an undergraduate], and as someone who identifies as a Christian, I really enjoy being able to integrate my faith and professional practice, ”said Kuilema. “Calvin’s has given me the opportunity to do that work in ways that are not possible elsewhere.”

The Fallout

When Sweda tied the knot with his girlfriend, Annica, on October 15, 2021, the culmination of the eight-year relationship that began when the two were juniors in high school.

An act that was explicitly forbidden by a Swedish employer, Calvin University, their marriage, prompting a meeting with college officials who told her she was violating staff policy. As a result, Calvin turned his research arm into a separate entity, enabling Sweden to remain on the team. But in the end, Sweden resigned so that it could speak freely on LGBTQ + issues.

And not only has Sweden lost its job; she also lost her faith along the way.

“I would no longer be called a Christian,” Sweden said. “I would say I am a spiritual person, but I am not very religious – mainly because I have been beaten by many different Christians. At this point, I personally no longer feel this is a positive thing for me. ”

He remembers being there and discussing his own rights in class as Calvin’s student. But now it’s a debate she refuses to have, noting that U.S. law allows her to marry her female partner. She upholds her work record and considers Calvin wrong to deny her civil rights as the Supreme Court affirmed when it legitimized same – sex marriage nationwide in Obergefell v. Hodges in 2015.

“Honestly, Calvin has nothing negative in my file,” Sweden said. “I did a lot of good for a lot of people there, and for the students I supervised, and it really comes down to the fact that I openly queere why this is all happening, and I think it’s disgusting. “

Sweda is a former student of Kuilema’s, and said he considers her a friend. He was aware of the risks involved with her wedding officials but said that after praying for her — and in consultation with her chiefs, her program director and the chair of the department — he decided to do so anyway. . As a supporter of LGBTQ + rights, he saw the opportunity to practice what he preached. Kuilema understood the lofty promises of holding a marriage ceremony while working for a church affiliated with a church that believes it’s okay to be gay but a sinner to physically act on those desires.

Kuilema is no stranger to the religious system that governs Chalvin University: in addition to attending the institution, he grew up as a member of the Reformed Christian Church. But he also believes that the prohibition on same-sex marriage is based on a misreading of the scriptures. Doubt came in when he was young and that only increased over the years.

“I started to have real questions, and for me as a Christian, the way through those questions was always deeper involvement and deeper study,” Kuilema said. “Over time, I have come to understand what I think the Bible actually prohibits as abusive, coercive forms of sex, including ritual costume sex, essentially gender trafficking or religious sex in temples, and not [prohibiting] a loving, committed person, a covenantal relationship between two consented adults. ”

Sex attraction is a touching issue in some Christian communities. While many churches in the U.S. believe that the Bible forbids same-sex activity, many congregations interpret the scriptures differently and, like Kuilema, welcome and uplift members of the LGBTQ + community. them. But the first camp contains the Christian Reformed Church, which also has an affiliated Chalvin University.

Calvin officials will not answer questions whether Kuilema violated any specified policy. The university also turned down an interview request from Inside Higher Ed. Answering questions by email, Calvin spokesman Matthew Kucinski declined to comment on personnel matters. In response to questions about doctrinal disagreements, he stressed the position of the church.

“The university’s position on human sexuality is based on the teachings of the Scriptures, the confessions, and, because of its covenantal ecclesiastical partnership with the Reformed Christian Church (CRC), the stated positions and pastoral guidance of denomination. The CRC and the university are of the view that human sexuality is a gift from God and that sexual intercourse is maintained exclusively in the context of marriage between a man and a woman, ”he wrote. “The CRC also teaches that sexual orientation is not a sin and that lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people – like everyone else – are created in the image of God and, as valuable members of the human family, should be treated with together. respect, grace, understanding and love. “

Kucinski also said that Calvin’s employees are required to be Christian and that faculty members must sign an agreement to “teach, speak and write in harmony with the Reformed apostles”. While faculty members may disagree with certain positions, they are expected to adhere to them.

Aside from his own pending end, Kuilema also worries about LGBTQ students at Calvin – a sentiment that Sweden also echoes. Both are concerned that such students come to Calvin – or other religious institutions – with an incomplete picture of how they will actually be treated.

“Religious higher education institutions have long lacked transparency about these policies for incoming LGBTQ students,” Kuilema said. “LGBTQ students from religious institutions deserve more clarity and transparency, as to whether or not they are fully welcomed in orientation but not in relation to relationships. I think LGBTQ youth are making these decisions about four years of their lives, perhaps hundreds of thousands of dollars, with imperfect information about how they will or will not be accepted by these institutions. If religious institutions are to continue to say, ‘Hey, come here and attend, but you would not be able to work here if you get married,’ students deserve to know in advance. “

When asked about these concerns, Kucinski cited the Calvin Code of Student Conduct, which explains that students are accountable for church standards regardless of sexual orientation or gender. He added, “Calvin University expects students to follow Bible guidelines for sexual intercourse and sexual intercourse. The student code of conduct prohibits sex outside of marriage, casual sexual contact, cohabitation, involvement in pornography, and cyber sex on the internet. ”

While Kucinski stated that the university aims to welcome and treat members of the LGBTQ + community “with respect, justice, grace and understanding,” he acknowledged “those who wish to assert Calvin As far as homosexual behavior is concerned, it is understandable that Calvin may not feel as welcome as they would like. ”

In the university community at large, fellow faculty members came together to support Kuilema, and dozens of letters signed a petition urging the Board of Trustees to cancel the decision to reject his reappointment.

The Trustees responded, without directly addressing the letter, by emailing students, faculty and staff addressing LGBTQ + issues in name, as opposed to in substance. That email, received by Inside Higher Ed, notes that “Calvin has a responsibility to uphold the positions of the church.” While the letter states that the church’s teaching states that sexual orientation is not an option, it is of the same sex interest. The letter states that “sexual acts are a choice, and… those that do not fall outside a covenantal union between one man and one woman do not reflect God’s intentions or desires for God’s people.”

LGBTQ+ Rights and the Church

Sara Moslener, a lecturer in the Department of Philosophy and Religion at Central Michigan University, said the battle for LGBTQ + rights in the church has been fought for many years and represents a divide between mainstream Christians and their evangelical counterparts.

But she sees that Christianity, in general, is more accepting of LGBTQ + rights.

“There are more and more churches where LGBTQ Christians can be welcomed and their families and spouses can be welcomed, and those churches are becoming more prominent,” Moslener said. “And that has been the case for the last 20 years. But also people within evangelical schools and churches are speaking up and trying to challenge from within, or they are leaving. ”

One obstacle to declaring LGBTQ + relationships, she said, is whether a church or college even has the independence to do so, depending on its denominational membership.

The overall change Moslener has seen on LGBTQ + rights at U.S. Christian institutions extends to Calvin, where she earned her undergraduate degree in 1996. In her time there, she said, she did not know anyone out there, but she’s less now just being gay. of secret on campus.

“The evolution took place among the faculty, among the students,” Moslener said.

Brie Loskota, executive director of the Martin Marty Center for Public Understanding of Religion at the University of Chicago, notes that support for LGBTQ + rights among individual Christians in the U.S. is relatively strong, especially among the youngest staff. But it’s harder to move institutions.

“It is about not only how a community engages with its scripture, but also what it claims to teach and claim their tradition, how they think under constant spiritual guidance and movement,” Loskota said in an email. “There are specific verses that are used as tools to underpin each community’s approach to how it treats LGBT people. Churches claim ‘biblical literacy’ in their favor, while others argue that those who claim to view the Bible as literal in their own interpretive and chosen form. In many ways these questions are at the heart of how religions work. How they respond to and shape their text, traditions, interpretive framework, cultural contexts, the people within them. ”

Some churches note that she sees “LGBT inclusion as a problem of a secular culture that should be strengthened and actively opposed.” Others adopt a “don’t ask, don’t say” policy, and some have used this moment to try to redress the harms of LGBT lack to welcome these members and their families. back in the fold. ” Still others were always welcoming.

Kuilema is concerned about the treatment of LGBTQ + students and employees, wondering if discrimination against them could violate civil rights law now that gay marriage is legal in all 50 states.

It draws attention to cases such as Loving v. Virginia, which legalized interfaith marriage in 1967. However, Bob Jones University implemented a racist policy that banned interracial dating for decades, leading the Supreme Court to uphold a 1983 decision revocation of tax – exempt status. (It took until 2000 for Bob Jones to end his ban on interracial relations, following a public crackdown.)

Like Loving v. Virginia, Obergefell v. Hodges allowed people to marry whoever they wanted. With that ruling, Kuilema thinks about how far colleges can deny certain civil rights.

“We have created a civil right,” Kuilema said. “And now the question is whether religious higher education institutions can continue to discriminate against people, demanding freedom of religion, when those people are just trying to access basic civil rights.”

Couples have one year from the date they receive the marriage license to marry in Las Vegas. The couple must give the official their marriage license and identification. Note that the couple will need one (1) witness for the wedding ceremony (most wedding churches can provide one). The couple may recite their own promises.

How much does a wedding officiant cost in Las Vegas?

NamePrice
Wedding Officers Pack$ 299.00
Apostille with Copy of Marriage Certificate (International Clients)$ 150.00
Video Options$ 150.00
Add RAW photos$ 150.00

What does it take to run a wedding in Nevada? Any licensed, ordained or appointed minister or official of a church or other religion authorized to marry in good standing within his or her church or religious organization, or either of them, incorporated, organized or established in this State, a notary public the Commission shall appoint. Secretary of State for …

How much does it cost to marry someone in Vegas?

Marriage License Cost You will need to pay about $ 102 for a marriage license in Las Vegas. The Marriage License Bureau accepts credit cards, traveler’s checks, cashier’s checks, and money orders.

Is getting married in Vegas expensive?

Vegas wedding costs vary depending on your needs and budget. Your price range can range from $ 400 to $ 15,000. Caesars Entertainment Weddings Everyone in Las Vegas has options.

Can you get married for free in Vegas?

Las Vegas wedding churches have always been a tourist attraction, but during 2019 – you can get married in Vegas for FREE! Tropicana LV Weddings is celebrating love for all with FREE Vegas weddings for couples looking to exchange their vows in 2019.

What do you need to marry someone in Las Vegas?

What documents do I need to get married in Vegas?

  • Valid photo ID issued by the government for you and your wife.
  • Credit or debit card to pay the $ 102 fee (cash, credit or debit.)
  • Internet access to apply for your Las Vegas marriage license online.

Can anyone officiate a wedding in Nevada?

NRS 122.062 states that a licensed, ordained or appointed minister, or church or religious official may be authorized to perform a particular marriage in the county in which the ceremony takes place if he is in good standing with his church or religious organization.

Can you officiate your own wedding in Nevada?

Nevada, Kansas and Maine allow you to become self – sufficient if you identify as ‘Friends’ or ‘Quakers’ and marry through the usual channels of those organizations. Illinois allows self-solemnity according to religious or indigenous ceremonies.

Do you need to be ordained to marry someone in Nevada?

According to Chapter 122 of the Revised Nevada Statutes (NRS) an applicant must be a licensed, ordained or appointed minister, or other church or religious official; in good standing with their church or religious organization and authorized to perform a marriage ceremony by that organization.

What do you need to marry someone in Nevada?

To get married in Nevada you must be at least 18 years old, and you must bring documentation to prove it. Your name and age must be listed on acceptable documents. Driving licenses, passports, military ID cards, permanent resident cards, and voter identification cards are acceptable.

How do I become a wedding officiant in Nevada?

Passport background check required. Attend a personal training course …. You must:

  • Apply in the county where the marriage will take place.
  • Take our online course to determine eligibility and get the application packet.
  • Please provide a notarial character reference from the couple you are marrying (included in the application)

Can anyone officiate a wedding in Vegas?

For those doing business as a sole proprietary married official, a Nevada State Business License is required. If you are a married contractor, receive 1099 and / or W – 2 to perform the duties of a married officer, a state business license is required.

Can anyone officiate a wedding in Nevada?

According to Chapter 122 of the Revised Nevada Statutes (NRS) an applicant must be a licensed, ordained or appointed minister, or other church or religious official; in good standing with their church or religious organization and authorized to perform a marriage ceremony by that organization.

Can anyone marry you in Las Vegas?

Yes, weddings in Vegas are included! They are legally binding. If you get married in Las Vegas it will be legal everywhere. The requirements for US citizens are the same as for non-US citizens.

Can I officiate a wedding in Las Vegas?

If you are planning to have a wedding in Las Vegas you will need to register with the Clark County Clerk’s office. The AMM website provides a page detailing how to successfully register as a wedding official in Las Vegas.

How much does it cost to get ordained in Nevada?

The application fee is $ 30 (Cash, Credit Card, Money Order, Cash Check or Traveler Check). Background checks are required for the following types of application and require payment of a $ 52 fee to the third party vendor performing the background check: Notary Publics (permanent only)

Can anyone run a wedding in Nevada? NRS 122.062 states that a licensed, ordained or appointed minister, or church or religious official may be authorized to perform a particular marriage in the county in which the ceremony takes place if he is in good standing with his church or religious organization.

What do you need to marry someone in Nevada?

To get married in Nevada you must be at least 18 years old, and you must bring documentation to prove it. Your name and age must be listed on acceptable documents. Driving licenses, passports, military ID cards, permanent resident cards, and voter identification cards are acceptable.

What do you need to marry someone in Las Vegas?

What documents do I need to get married in Vegas?

  • Valid photo ID issued by the government for you and your wife.
  • Credit or debit card to pay the $ 102 fee (cash, credit or debit.)
  • Internet access to apply for your Las Vegas marriage license online.

How much does it cost to marry someone in Vegas?

Marriage License Cost You will need to pay about $ 102 for a marriage license in Las Vegas. The Marriage License Bureau accepts credit cards, traveler’s checks, cashier’s checks, and money orders.

Do you need an officiant to get married in Nevada?

Once you have a Nevada marriage license, you must have a wedding ceremony within the state with a legal marriage official.

How do I become a wedding officiant in Nevada?

Passport background check required. Attend a personal training course …. You must:

  • Apply in the county where the marriage will take place.
  • Take our online course to determine eligibility and get the application packet.
  • Please provide a notarial character reference from the couple you are marrying (included in the application)

Can anyone officiate a wedding in Vegas?

For those doing business as a sole proprietary married official, a Nevada State Business License is required. If you are a married contractor, receive 1099 and / or W – 2 to perform the duties of a married officer, a state business license is required.

How much does it cost to get ordained in Nevada?

The application fee is $ 30 (Cash, Credit Card, Money Order, Cash Check or Traveler Check).

What do you say when exchanging rings?

Vocabulary of Modern Ring Exchange

  • “This ring is a sign of my love for you. …
  • “I give you this ring as a reminder that we face this world together. …
  • “I give you this ring as a gift that lasts forever. …
  • “With this ring, we take a new path to our adventure together.

What does the officer say about the rings? It is a circle; for the love given it comes back again. Your rings are precious because you wear them with love. They symbolize your commitment in marriage. They remind you of who you are, where you have been, and where you are going.

What does the officiant say after the ring exchange?

After the Wedding Ring Exchange This is where the priest, minister, justice of the peace (or whoever you have chosen as activist) will announce you as the newlywed couple, usually with the well-known phrase, “I say now. husband and wife.â €

What should officiant say during ring exchange?

“May this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and a reminder of my loyalty to you. It is a great honor for me to call you my (wife / husband).” “With this ring I married, and with it, I give you all the treasures of my mind, my heart and my hands.” (Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my love.

What comes after the ring exchange in a wedding?

After the Wedding Ring Exchange Once you have exchanged votes and exchanged wedding rings, the pronunciation is the last part of the wedding ceremony.

What happens after the ring exchange?

After exchanging votes and rings, you both seal your marriage with a kiss. You are officially married!

What do Christians say when they exchange rings?

Let us pray: Blessed, Lord, give these rings, so that those who wear them together may abide in your peace and grow in each other ‘s eyes. ” (Each sentence together) “I give you this ring, as I say. give yourself, with love and affection. Always throw it in peace. “

What does pouring sand at a wedding mean?

What is the Unity Sand Ceremony? The unity sand ceremony is a tradition in which a couple pours sand from individual vessels into a unified, central one. It shows two people coming together in a marriage.

What do the ceremonial colors of sand mean? White Ceremony Color Meaning Sand: Purity, spiritual values, devotion. Yellow: Harmony, balance, friendship. Pink or Red: Love, passion, romance, happiness. Green: Health, luck, prosperity. Purple: Power, dignity, strength.

What does sand symbolize in a wedding?

Apart from the unionist candle, the sand ceremony is perhaps the most famous unionist wedding ceremony. Both partners are meant to pour sand into one container, which demonstrates their commitment to a lifetime and the combination of the two worlds. Sometimes parents are also included, as a symbol of family unification.

What do you say at a sand ceremony?

_______________ and ______________, today you are in your separate life together. The two separate bottles of sand represent your individual life, your particular family and your unique friends. They represent all that you are and all that you will ever be as an individual. They also reflect your life before today.

What does the color sand mean?

A step-by-step guide to color engraving The first thing you need to do after applying the clear coat (and allowing it to heal properly) is color engraving. Color engraving is where you smooth out the clean coat so when it’s time to soften the paint, you get the mirror – like finish.

Who pours the sand at the wedding?

The officer will first pour his / her claims into the unity vase, to show the basis of the faith. Then the bride and groom pour their sand into the unity vase at the same time. (Note: if you pour at exactly the same time, your sand will be one big mix instead of the nice layers you see in photos.

Who pours the sand at the wedding?

The officer will first pour his / her claims into the unity vase, to show the basis of the faith. Then the bride and groom pour their sand into the unity vase at the same time. (Note: if you pour at exactly the same time, your sand will be one big mix instead of the nice layers you see in photos.

Who does wedding sand ceremony?

The officer explains the meaning of the ceremony and how it relates to the couple getting married. The officer invites the groom to pour some of his sand (so-called blue sand) into the empty vessel. The officer invites the bride to do the same with her sand (let ‘s say it’s pink).

How do you do a family sand ceremony?

Creating a Family Sand Ceremony The bride, groom, and baby use their own color of sand and pour them into a central vase, creating a souvenir that can be displayed in your home for years to come. If more than one child is involved, they can all use the same color of sand, or each child can pick their own color.

What does the officiant say for the sand ceremony?

UNION SAND CEREMONY – Votes 1 Vocabulary The two separate sand bottles are a symbol of individual lives, families and friends. They represent all that you are and all that you will ever be as an individual. They also reflect your life before today.

What do you say in a sand ceremony?

_______________ and ______________, today you are in your separate life together. The two separate bottles of sand represent your individual life, your particular family and your unique friends. They represent all that you are and all that you will ever be as an individual. They also reflect your life before today.

What does the sand ceremony symbolize?

The flowing sand and blending the colors in the Unity Sand Ceremony is about bringing two worlds together in one. The two sands symbolize all that the bride and groom had or will have in the future.

How do you introduce sand at a wedding?

Two people take sand from their individual vessels and combine the grains into one. The Act stands for twinning and the creation of a new union and family. The combined vessel symbolizes the marriage of hope, dreams and values ​​of both parties.

Does sand ceremony come before or after vows?

Like a union candlelight ceremony, a sand union union ceremony involves the newlywed couple indicating that they have officially come together as one union. Typically, the event takes place during the vows, and the bride and groom choose to remain silent or give a speech during the process.

What do you say during Unity ceremony?

I will ask each of you to pour the contents inside your own vase into the middle vase together. As the glass from each vase blends together it imagines your unique life, your friends and family, united in one union, the beginning of your journey as husband and wife.